Master Tom and slave linda: SouthEast Master/slave 2009
Added June 2016:
Master Tom and slave Linda- 2016 Jack Stice Memorial Award winners (speech given below)
Our award winners have been a couple who exemplify the Master/slave life. Those extraordinary people have been loving each other for twenty-one years. They bravely stood up and proclaimed love, obedience, mastery and marriage when these words weren’t said together in our M/s communities but were treated with suspicion. Like many M/s couples 15 years ago they heard how marriage and M/s didn’t go together. They heard how being in love wasn’t supposed to be part of a dynamic. They heard how a strong, smart, powerful slave wasn’t really taking direction and obedient to her Master.
They stood to be counted among us and educate us to dispel the myths of M/s. They did this for their community not once but twice. The first time they won the title SE Master/slave at Together in Leather. The second time, in 2009 they stepped forward to represent Masters and slaves for SELF. Having been previously vetted for the title, they accepted the challenge with such grace and dedication when their region truly needed them. Not when it was convenient for them.
The humility exhibited by this M/s couple has been a hallmark of how they have interacted with each other and others. Their educational efforts have provided generations with inspiration and possibility.
Many say the words of a slave are a reflection of the Master and provide a window into the integrity of the relationship. It was this integrity of a Master/slave relationship that they gave willingly to our communities who needed to witness a model and example of M/s at its best.
This slaves’ words in her speech when they competed for the M/s International title were:
“Being a slave for me means complete devotion, submissive surrender, but not blind submission and certainly not letting go of all limitations. As his devoted slave, I cannot hold my tongue while Master goes blindly into the dark to experience things that I know will either be bad for Him or have regrettable consequences without offering him what I see and knowing the final decision is his alone. As a human being, I have limitations. I can only trust that Master knows these limits and respects them…for He must if I am to call Him Master. He does and it is through Master I have become a completely surrendered slave who knows her slave heart.
So, what does it take to be a slave? Brains, brawn, diplomacy, strength of mind body and soul, utter devotion, complete surrender, and the stubbornness to face the one who owns you and let them know, albeit respectfully, that this may not be the correct path to take at the present time. I have found in my journey that when I completely surrendered, gave complete unwavering devotion, maintained strength of mind body and soul, and occasionally said no, my slave heart bloomed and Master was there to make sure it gets all the sunshine and dominance it needs to survive.”
It is with unmitigated joy I have the pleasure of awarding the Jack Stice Memorial Community Service Award to Master Tom and slave linda, your SE Master/slave 2009 and 2005.
Added April 2015:
slave linda's speech at SPLF
What does it take to be his slave? Complete devotion? Absolute surrender? Blind submission? Letting go of all limitations? When I entered into my contract with Master, these are the concepts I examined. I had never been a slave before that time. At that time I wasn’t sure I had what is known as a slave heart either. The heart that longs to serve. The heart that longs to be owned. This would come in time…but how to achieve that heart was my biggest question.
When I first met Master, I was independent, savvy, and slightly manipulative. I pushed every chance I could. Master saw something in me that no one else could see. He saw the slave longing to be…longing to surrender, but not knowing how. He took all those ugly qualities I showed to other dominants and molded them into His perfect slave. A slave that has a voice: will say no when it is needed and will help Him realize His journey through life with the least possible resistance. He has taught me, with gentle dominance, the difference between manipulation and pushing, and being respectful and doing what is good for me, while still getting what I need and serving Him in a manner that He deems right for us. He allows me to still have that savvy, brain storming, protective, nurturing personality that I have always had, but He has molded and toned it into a positive light and taught me to be true to myself, therefore being true to Him.
Being a slave for me means complete devotion, submissive surrender, but not blind submission and certainly not letting go of all limitations. As his devoted slave, I cannot hold my tongue while Master goes blindly into the dark to experience things that I know will either be bad for Him or have regrettable consequences without offering him what I see and knowing the final decision is his alone. As a human being, I have limitations. I can only trust that Master knows these limits and respects them…for He must if I am to call Him Master. He does and it is through Master I have become a completely surrendered slave who knows her slave heart.
So, what does it take to be a slave? Brains, brawn, diplomacy, strength of mind body and soul, utter devotion, complete surrender, and the stubbornness to face the one who owns you and let them know, albeit respectfully, that this may not be the correct path to take at the present time. I have found in my journey that when I completely surrendered, gave complete unwavering devotion, maintained strength of mind body and soul, and occasionally said no, my slave heart bloomed and Master was there to make sure it gets all the sunshine and dominance it needs to survive.
Calendar of Events
Sep 4-7, 2009 Master/slave Conference 2009, Washington DC
Sep 18-20, 2009 Fetish in the Forest 2009, Memphis, TN
Jan 22-24, 2010 Southwest Leather Conference 2010
Competing at South Plains LeatherFest in March
March 2010 News
The weekend of Feb 26-28th 2010, Southeast Master and slave 2009 Master Tom and slave linda competed at the International Master/slave contest in Dallas Texas.
Hard work and preparation for the last several months combined with help from the local SouthEast Leather Community have absolutely given us all a couple to be proud of.
While they did not take home the international title, Master Tom and slave linda wanted us to send this message to their community:
"We are so happy to have had this great opportunity to represent the Southeast. We know the judges had a difficult decision as we feel all the contestants have done such a great job! Congratulations to Master Obsidian and slave namaste Much thanks to the producers of SELF for having faith in us!"
We look forward to celebrating with Master Tom and slave linda at SouthEast LeatherFest and hope everyone will join us in congratulating them on representing the Southeast!
To contact Master Tom and slave linda: southeastms09@gmail.com
or reach them on FetLife: seMaster09 and seslave09
June 2009 Column
Wow and I mean WOW! That pretty much sums up what happened during our weekend at SELF 2009 this year! slave and I planned on showing up and having a very relaxing time and just enjoying being with old (and new) friends for the weekend. Things pretty much started out that way, and almost ended up that way, until a conversation that Lady Catherine had with us..... Before I get too much into that let me introduce us.
I am Master Tom, and my girl is slave linda. We are a Master/slave couple and have been 24/7 for over a decade. Several years ago (late 2004) we ran for (and won) the title Southeast Master/slave for 2005. The next year was a whirlwind for us, travelling, teaching, learning a LOT ourselves, and strengthening our own relationship along the way. We truly enjoyed our year of frequent trips, but after it was over linda was missing her time with her children, and other complications arose....
Regretfully, we ended up having to limit our travel to events for a few years after that while linda went through a few surgeries, not to mention trying to get the youngest one off to college, and out on his own. During this time I came to realize just how much I missed the wonderful chances of being with our leather family, so early this year we started attending the leather events again, travelling to Phoenix and Dallas among other places. During this time we had discussed how much more we could share now that we had a few more years of experience under our belt. When it came time for SELF we just knew we couldn't pass up the chance to see all our local family and friends, plus all our extended family and frinds that travelled all the way to Hotlanta for SELF 2009!
Well, back to the conversation with Lady Catherine.... Knowing how much we enjoy teaching and sharing, she came to us with the opportunity to again represent the Southeast. slave and I were both taken back at first, but after some pondering (not much) we decided that this could be a great chance to give back to our community, share even more, and learn and grow even more ourselves!
So, slave and I come into this with eyes open.... Let the whirlwind begin! Over the next few weeks we are going to start making our plans for the year as to where to go and what we feel we can offer the community. Please, feel free to contact us at southeastMs09@gmail.com if you would like to discuss an opportunity for us to present at your group or event. We really want to try get to every state in the Southeast, and will make every effort to go to everywhere we can. We'll be posting more soon with some of the workshops and presentations that we are putting together!
Our sincere thanks to Lady Catherine and SELF 2009 for the opportunity to again represent the Southeast!
Master Tom and slave linda
SouthEast Master/slave 2009
January 2010 Column
Wow! That about sums up our past three months with our title. We have had a wonderful journey thus far making new friends and renewing past relationships with old ones. We had a very full September traveling from Memphis to Washington DC. For the past couple of years, slave and I have been mentoring a couple who live in Memphis and they got together with the group there, IMPACT, and invited us to present at one of their functions. We presented a class on protocols in a very intimate atmosphere in the dungeon they use. We found the group of people there to be very open to learning different practices, and very willing to teach what they have already learned. They were all very hospitable, and extremely transparent in their actions and acceptance of us, not only as the appointed Ms Couple but as virtual outsiders to their community. Later that month, we were invited back to Fetish In the Forest to present to a much larger group of people from the area. Again, we cannot say enough about this open, honest, lovable group of kinks! In between we attended the Master/slave Conference in DC. I am always amazed at how much information about our lifestyle is out there and how many people are involved in it. This conference gave us the opportunity to not only renew some past relationships, but to make new ones as well. slave took the opportunity to explore her slave heart and bond with the other slaves and submissives there and the workshops put on by Master Z, Lady Catherine and Master Scott with his extended family were just wonderful to attend. We always walk away with a little more than we came with when we attend such an informational conference.
We will be attending SWLC later this month and then it is on to South Plains, for the International Contest. We are very much looking forward to SWLC, as it always provides a much needed energy recharge. South Plains will be stressful, but we really feel that we are ready for the challenge. We have both been working on different speeches and workshops, perfecting them and hoping for the best. We will however, maintain that we are simply Master Tom and slave linda. We have never changed and feel that we exemplify our Master/slave relationship as it relates to us.
Producer note
It's unusual that I add a personal note but in this instance I feel compelled. Master Tom and slave Linda stepped up to this title without notice and accepting a large scale change to their lives. They were seasoned and had already served the southeast holding a previous Master/slave title.
It was pure selflessness. We expect titleholders to hold up under scutiny but they knew there would be questions since this was the first time this title was appointed. I have to say they exhibited so much grace and such a dedication to remaining the Master/slave they know themselves to be. So, I'm putting this in writing-- they are my hero's not because they stepped up when their region needed them but for how they choose to step up. I can think of no better example of Master/slave relationships. Thank you for the dedication to your region but most of all, thank you for showing us the dediction you hold dear to one another.
Thank you,
Lady Catherine Gross
September 2015
Producer note: July 27,2020 Master Tom
With a broken heart, I am sharing the news that Master Tom, Southeast Master 2009 & 2005, winner of the 2016 Jack Stice Memorial Community Service Award, died Monday, July 27, 2020.
Master Tom was generous. He gave years of his life to help others grow and realize their best selves and their best relationships. He tackled the issues of “power slaves” long before it was an accepted concept. He tackled the issue that you can marry your slave and love your slave when those paths were questioned as not indicative of real M/s. He held fast to his ideals and his relationship without criticizing others’ choices of relationship style.
He mentored, helped, guided, and provided scholarships for many to attend SELF. Master Tom was humble, funny, and choose to laugh and learn his entire life. His proudest accomplishment was having the devoted surrender of his slave, Linda. Their twenty-six years together provided an excellent example of happy, healthy M/s that made each of them better together. They were meant for one another. We are better for having known them and for the service they so willingly offered to their community.
Lady Catherine & SELF
Miss Rae: Ms. SouthEast LeatherFest 2009
Hello, I am your Ms. SouthEast LeatherFest 2009. I am from South Florida and I have been active in the community for 8 years. I am the Co-founder of Women Of Leather Florida. WOLF is a social and educational group for all women. It is the goal of the group to give a safe place for all women to grow and learn in the leather community. We also do fundraising events and social outings.
Calendar of Events
June 27-28 St. Pete Pride Parade and NLA-CFL fund raiser
July 25th Orlando MUNCH -Rhythmic Beating/Drum circle
August 29th The Wood Shed Orlando for Women's weekend hosted by WOLF
September 26-27th Fetish Fair Fleamarket
October 31st attending ILS/B ICBB San Fransisco
April 15-18th 2010 Compete at IMSL
April 24-25th Beyond Leather Ft. Lauderdale
June 11-13th SouthEast LeatherFest step down
June 2009 Column
Hello, I am your Ms. SouthEast LeatherFest 2009. I am from South Florida and I have been active in the community for 8 years. I am the Co-founder of Women Of Leather Florida. WOLF is a social and educational group for all women. It is the goal of the group to give a safe place for all women to grow and learn in the leather community. We also do fundraising events and social outings.
What can I say about my run for a title? From the time I decided to run, I received an overwhelming amount of support from many people in our lifestyle. It is my hope that my title will allow me to meet new people and learn from them. I am excited about bringing back new "tricks" and knowledge to my local community. Considering the difficulties our community has seen in the past, I am proud of the work that has been done here to strengthen our core.
My calendar is already getting filled up. The weekend of June 27th, my pet and I will be participating in the St. Pete Pride Parade in conjunction with the NLA-Central Florida chapter. We will also be attending their charity auction on Sunday before heading back home to Ft. Lauderdale. But, first up is our own showing of pride here when we attend the Stonewall Street Festival in Wilton Manors this weekend, June 20-21.
I have been invited to attend the Orlando Munch the last weekend of July and then teach a Rhythmic Beating with Drum Circle class. This shows how to use the rhythm of the drums to reach a cathartic space. With the people playing the drums leading the speed and intensity of the scene in the circle, the bottom generally goes into a trance-like state.
In August, I will be taking WOLF to the Woodshed in Orlando for a Women's Weekend. My pet and I will be doing a class on Erotic Boot Blacking. If you ever wondered why she does what she does, this class will explain it all. Then in October, I will be going to San Fransisco to support my pet in her run for the International Community Boot Black title.
I want to thank Catherine Gross, Kyle, kim and the too-numerous-to-mention SELF volunteers who all worked so hard to create a wonderful weekend. The judges were all very welcoming and made me feel very comfortable throughout the contest and I really appreciated their time. The best part was meeting my fellow contestants and creating new bonds and friendships. Especially Ms. Jan who is a real class act! I also wish to thank my friends who made the trip to support me especially Debra and lovelee who helped to make my fantasy scene such a huge success (can you hear me now?). And last, but certainly not least, I would love to thank my wonderful and amazing pet, chris. Without her support and loving service, I could not have done it.
Keep in touch with me here and on FetLife (I'm there as MissRae) for updated adventures. If you would like me to visit your group or event please send me a request MsSELF2009@yahoo.com . I look forward to a wonderful year!!!
Miss Rae
Ms. SouthEast LeatherFest 2009
October 2009 Column
Wow! That is the best word to describe my last few months as Ms. SELF 2009. I met many wonderful people and watched my local community pull together to support me in my title year. I have been to the Tampa munch to support my sash brother Nefarious. We also visited the Ybor Eagle and the Fetish Circuit. I cannot tell you how warm and welcome both places made me feel. My pet and I also went to support the NLA-Central Florida chapter and marched with them in the St. Pete Pride Parade. We got to crack whips and show our pride along with Sir Raul (International Leather Sir 2008), boy bill (International Leather boy 2008), Sir Jason (SouthEast Leather Sir 2009) and boy kirk (South East Leather boy 2009) along with my pet chris (SouthEast Community BootBlack 2009). All of the members of NLA-CFL were great and the canes and toys we donated to the auction helped to raise money for the local chapter.
In August we started a new tradition for Women Of Leather Florida. We accepted the challenge put forth by Justin (Bensonboy on FetLife) from the group "The Guard" about being lazy in leather. WOLF is now dedicated to learning leather history and will pick a topic every month to research and share. The first month we learned what the tern "Old Guard" means. We were lucky to also have a presenter for the demo that was very knowledgeable in this subject.
At the end of August we visited the Woodshed in Orlando. Master Cecil and his staff asked my pet to teach “Erotic Leather Care”. We also got to have a Saturday afternoon for women only. The members of WOLF, WPEN and WINK all got together for a day of leather care, rhy thmic beating and just plain ol’ girl bonding. It was a most excellent weekend and one of the best parts was getting to share knowledge with so many others..
The end of September brings another lesson in leather for WOLF and a trip to Fetish Fair Flea Market in Charlotte, North Carolina. I will be presenting 3 classes for the event: “Dungeon Ettiquette”, “Rhythmic Beating” and “Caning” as well as a class by my pet on “Erotic Leather Care”. I look forward to helping Nefarious with the auction on Friday night. We will be donating a co-topping scene together. I cannot wait.
In October, I will be making my first trip to California to support my pet in her international title run in San Francisco for the International Leather Sir/boy and Community bootblack contests. I have heard so much about this event and look forward to meeting many people on the other coast. I will also get to be there to support my dear friends Sir Raul and boy bill for=2 0their step down from International Leather Sir/boy.
I feel so lucky to have such a wonderful community to represent. I am doing my best to uphold my promise to learn new skills and educate my region. I look forward to seeing the friends I have made and meeting the new ones on my journey.
In Rhythm and Leather,
Miss Rae
Ms.SouthEast LeatherFest 2009
MsSELF2009@yahoo.com
www.WomenOfLeatherFlorida.org
January 2010 Column
Happy New Year!!
Well another year has come and gone. I am now on my push for International Ms. Leather 2010 (IMsL) and working hard. My life seems to be falling into a schedule. January weekends are full and February is starting to look the same.
Let me fill you in on how my year finished up. At the end of October my pet and I went to ILSb/ICBB in San Francisco and had a blast. I got to meet 3 other wonderful women that will be competing with me at IMsL in April. I also got to meet the current ImsL, Lamilani. She is beautiful inside and out. She will also be coming to present for WOLF the first weekend in April. We have changed the date of the group to work with the local shibari group and look forward to her wonderful rope work.
In November we attended the Leather Masked Ball hosted by Lambda Men's Brotherhood, Inc. This is a national fund raising event for the past 3 years and is still growing strong. This year they raised money for the The Leather Archives and Museum and Equality Florida. It was an amazing night of dancing and socializing. The leather men of south Florida have been such a wonderful support for my pet and me. I cannot thank them enough. We have plans for continued collaborations on future fund raising events.
Other than my WOLF group, December was spent with my leather community and local family. WOLF finished up the year with an amazing drum circle at the Lifestyle Alternative Center and a luncheon for the members at a local sushi restaurant. My pet and I supported a local group Y.K.N.O.T. (Young Kinksters ‘n Older Teachers) at LAC in their holiday “Sensation Stations” party. I was able to educate and teach local kinksters about canes.
January will start with a trip to the year’s first F.L.U.I.D (Florida Leaders United in Diversity) meeting. It is a pleasure to be involved with a group that endeavors to unity and support all leather/fetish groups in our state. The 3rd weekend is WOLF and we will have a wonderful regional presenter, Barbary, coming in to teach us “The Rope Dance”. The last Saturday will be jam-packed when we start by heading to Orlando’s Woodshed for a women’s day. This day will have a speaker educating us on leather history and will include all the women’s groups in Florida. The evening will start with a WOLF sponsored “Casino Night” fundraiser. We will be dealing blackjack, poker, roulette and more to raise money for The Woodshed’s new location opening this month. The Woodshed and its members have been a huge support to me in this title year and it is a pleasure to be able to repay them for all their kindness.
February brings yet another regional presenter in the current Ms. SouthEast Olympus Leather 2010 Master Pam and her partner Mr. North Carolina Leather 2009 Phantom Blue. I had the pleasure of meeting this couple when I presented at Fetish Fair Fleamarket in Charlotte this past September. I will also be working another “Casino Night” to raise funds for The Wellness Center. This is a local not for profit organization that gives support to people living with HIV.
I want to thank all of those that have helped and supported me on this new journey. I could not have asked for a better community to start my journey with and look forward to continue to bring regional and national presenters in to help us all grow together. Thank you to the members of Women Of Leather Florida (WOLF) without you there would be no pack. The South Florida Munch and Ally the local munch lady. You are a wonderful friend and leader. Master Cecil and the volunteers at The Woodshed Orlando. Ms. Martha and her beautiful corsets and my producer and her staff, Lady Catherine, thank you for believing in my journey and me. I will continue to work hard and represent you all with integrity and leather heart.
March 2010 Column
Wow, I cannot believe this title year is flying by. In October, I went to ILSb/ICBB where I got to watch my pet compete for her International title. While at the event I also got the opportunity to meet some wonderful people. My pet and I barely found the time to take a short tour of San Francisco that included a visit to my favorite shoe store, Fluevog. I was in heaven.
In November, I attended the Leather Masked Ball held by the group Bound South. This is a wonderful charity event and I am happy to have been a part of their efforts to raise $20,000 for Equality Florida and LA&M.
I spent December with my chosen family. Women of Leather Florida had a great time at our end of the year sushi fest. Then it all started up again in January with our first regional presenter Barbary and her presentation of the Rope Dance. At the end of January, WOLF made a trip to The Woodshed in Orlando to have a casino night fundraiser. The proceeds got split between my travel fund for International Ms Leather and to help The Woodshed with the move to their new building.
In February, WOLF had the Wonderful Master Pam and PhantonmBlue in town to teach about breath play. We also had another casino night and this time we raised money for The Wellness Center of South Florida. At the end of March, I went with my pet and local titleholders to the Ybor Eagle to support the South East titleholder fund.
Now I am focused on getting ready for IMsL. I can’t wait to see my old friends and make some new ones. I hope to honor my South East community and look forward to seeing you all at the anniversary blow out at SELF in June.
June 2010 Column
Let me say this has been one hell of a ride! I want to thank everyone for the support I was shown while I traveled the region. If I did not make it to your area, please contact me and I’ll do my best.
The last time I wrote, I was on my way to International Ms. Leather to compete for the 2010 title. I was excited from the moment I left my door for the airport. My flights were early and since we were traveling on Southwest Airlines and they don’t charge for your first two checked bags, I got to pack extra shoes!! Upon arriving at the hotel I met the other contestants in the lounge and was able to get in some quality time with old friends and new ones. It was wonderful to have that time with the other women. We were all ready for a great weekend.
I could not have asked for a better group to compete with for the title. I would be lying if I said I wasn’t worried about how a group of people this size would get along together and I’m happy to say that we got along splendidly. Not once did I hear anything negative or feel a bad vibe. Every one of us showed love and support for the other. It was going to be a tough choice for the judges as there wasn’t a bad choice in the bunch. Between the tour of San Francisco, classes, women and the shows at the event, it was a blur of fun and friends.
In the end I was honored to take 2nd runner up and share the podium with the amazing and beautiful Donna, Lady of Light, who received 1st runner up and Mollena our new IMsL 2010. The International Ms. Bootblack award went to Jayson DaBoi and Luna received 1st runner up. They were both a lot of fun and had great energy all weekend.
The flight home was long but we were glad to get back. It was Monday night and all I wanted to do was see my puppy and get some rest. My next few days went fast. I returned to work on Tuesday morning and worked the week only to start over again Thursday night with volunteering for Beyond Leather. Another wonderful weekend and a mini reunion with the IMsL family of Lamalani and Mollena.
I spent May within my local community. I enjoyed a weekend BBQ with the South Florida Boys of Leather, an SSC fundraiser with Jeffery Payne and a send off party and fundraiser for Mr. Ramrod, Joe Watkins, on his way to compete at IML. We are all very proud of Joe for placing a very respectable 7th place out of the 50+ contestants for IML. Also, my WOLF (Women Of Leather Florida) group has been steadily growing in membership. I can't describe the happiness this group brings to me and so many others. I have been very lucky in meeting some fantastic women who have agreed to travel here to give a demo/presentation for future WOLF meetings including Lamalani, PhoenixB, Barbary, Q and more.
June starts the kick off of gay pride and I will be participating in some of the parades with the leather communities. I will be stepping down from my title soon at SELF. I am really looking forward to seeing so many of the friends I have made and sharing my step down speech with them. I hope to see many of you on my continued travels. Thank you again and follow your heart and leather journey.
In Rhythm and Leather,
Miss Rae
Nefarious: Mr. SouthEast LeatherFest 2009
On December 30, 2013 Nefarious, Mr. SouthEast LeatherFest 2009 passed away. His memorial service took place in Spartanburg, SC where many of his friends and family gathered to say goodbye.
As a part of the SELF titleholders family, we would like to take a moment to remember Nefarious and the many ways that he touched and contributed to our communities. The following is an excerpt from his title column journal January 2010 during the second half of his title year. He did 30+ events and fifteen states during his title year. He continued to represent SELF and bring others to the event. He felt opportunity and education was important. It is with this in mind that we have begun a scholarship in his name. Our thoughts and prayers are with his family. Nefarious, you will be missed by many. Thank you for always reaching out a hand to others.
The SouthEast LeatherFest Family
The pictures are of Lady Beth and Michael. Courtesy of Lady Beth. Added note: Lady Beth died a little over a year later. Lady Beth contributed to the knowledge of many in the southeast and outside of our region.
Both will be missed deeply.
Calendar of Events
July 4 Triangle Munch Group annual picnic Raleigh, NC
July 9-12 Apex, NY Summer Bash: Predicament Bondage and Bloodplay. Albany, NY
July 25 CAPEX, Charlotte, NC
August 1&2 T3WD Columbia, SC
August 8 Tampa Munch: “Who’s your Daddy?” and Bedroom Bondage, Tampa, FL
August 22 CAPEX Fundraiser Auction (come bid for me!) Charlotte, NC
September 19 T3WD Fair: TBD Columbia, SC
September 25-27 Fetish Fair Fleamarket, Charlotte, NC: TBD (tent)
October 9-12 DomCom, Atlanta, GA (tent)
June 2009 Column
So, what is the home life of a new title-holder? Let me see… Working on a column. Trying to finish my laundry. Taking care of sick kids. Unpacking and trying to find all the business cards everyone gave me. I have a business card holder for ones to hand out, but someone told me the first thing I need to get is something to collect all the ones that I’m given. Very good advice.
Platforms are difficult to choose. I chose “growth by education” as mine because that idea has shaped my life. From the first time I walked into the first lifestyle event I attended, I’ve been learning and I’ve been growing. Sitting in workshops about subjects I really wasn’t very interested in has opened my eyes to a lot of activities and ideas that, today, I really enjoy. I want to keep growing, discovering who I am and can be, and pass on that joy and excitement.
Winning the title is one more step on my journey. Without the love and support of my friends and family, I know that it would have taken me a lot longer. My life has been a series of changes, and according to a popular motivational speaker, “all change is painful.” There are good times as well as bad. Through it all, there are people who loved me and believed in me. My Leather family, those who have served and therefore helped me grow as a Dominant, my Mentors, brothers, and sisters… each and every one has brought some piece of the truth to me when it was the right time.
It’s amazing how quickly a calendar can fill up. “Required” appearances sound like an imposition, but they are opportunities. I know I have friends that I will get to meet this year. Each group’s energy is different, and I can’t wait to taste it.
Yours in Leather,
Nefarious
Mr. SouthEast LeatherFest 2009
October 2009 Column
“I’ve been on a lot of job interviews, but never one with an audience.” When I said this at SELF, I thought that I had a good idea of how much would be involved. Not so much! Three months and twenty-five-thousand miles later, I’m taking November and December off (best piece of advice I received!). Almost every weekend has been planned, an event, appearance, or presentation. My family and I need some time together.
July 4: For Independence Day weekend, I revisited Triangle Munch Group in NC for the first time in over a year. They have been great supporters of SELF and made us welcome at their annual picnic. A certain Sir seemed to find my boi’s neck interesting and tasty that afternoon, and hasty explanations needed to be made to a concerned mother (can anyone say “awkward?”).
July 11: The next weekend I had been invited to present in New York, my home state, at APeX’s Summer Bash and I had an absolutely wonderful time. The venue has a very spiritual energy and I connected with great people and met friends that I didn’t know I had at the time. Predicament Bondage is probably the most entertaining presentation on my list. Presenting it with an unknown “stunt-bottom” was a blast, her Daddy let me give her a birthday treat later that evening, and grand time was had by all. I debuted a new bloodplay class and the spiritual energy of the venue contributed to the positive experience.
July 25: Later that month, our Family descended on Charlotte, NC. My boi Andy and I marked our first co-presentation on Erotic Bootblacking by chipping one of her teeth during the demo. Granted, it was a small chip but we still laugh because it was during the slow, sensual section, not the rough body-play segment.
August 1: The first weekend in August took us to Columbia SC for T3WD’s anniversary event, a two-day workshop geared specifically for M/s relationships. As presenters, we try to tailor our workshops to the audience. Walking up to a whiteboard and jotting down topics the audience wants to discuss is a very effective way to do that.
August 8: Tampa Munch brought me down to Florida the following weekend for two presentations, both of which went very well. Afterward, we jaunted around, saw a great gay, leather bar, and then went to a social club night. My hostess’s leather dress just came back from the tailor and I wanted to treat it. The scene we had was an energy exchange, worship scene, and something that I had never experienced. I will always stay connected to this lovely woman who helped me tap into an energy I didn’t know that I had within me.
August 15: WINK invited our family down for the bloodplay demo. Orange was in service to me for the first time (“It’s only for the weekend…”) and the four of us headed for the coast. We were told that there was a waiting list for the workshop, and the energy that exploded from what we were doing was palpable. We flew and the energy just kept building throughout the evening. I can’t wait to go back.
August 22: CAPEX invited us again for their fundraiser. They are trying to get a permanent place and SELF was happy to contribute a weekend package to support their efforts. I blacked with my boi, and tied a Viking, and again, a good time was had by all!
September 5: The Red Chair in Birmingham AL had us down to present our Erotic Bootblacking demo. You’ve got to love a demo that is introduced with a disclaimer of “You will see things during this demo that are not allowed during our socials,” and ends with “Now everyone’s horny.” What we do is fun, hot, and we’re supposed to be excited and ride that energy wave.
September 19: T3WD in Columbia SC brought us down to give demos on Decorative Bondage and Bloodplay. Words of wisdom for any who may be inclined to “mouth off” while sitting as a stunt-bottom: do not shoot off at the mouth at the person holding the scalpel just before he starts cutting… especially if the person holding the scalpel is a Tarheel fan and the presentation is in the middle of Gamecock country. After running to Burger King for a Whopper with cheese, we met with the local Leathermen and bootblacked throughout the evening.
September 24-27: I enjoyed returning to the Charlotte Traveling Munch group in NC once again. “Switching” was the topic of the evening, and it was a well-received debut presentation. I was excited to pick up my sash-sister, Miss Rae, at the Charlotte airport so that we could present at the third annual Fetish Fair Fleamarket. The charity auction to support the National Coalition for Sexual Freedom (NCSF) raised over one-thousand dollars to support NCSF’s ongoing work to preserve our rights to live our lives the way we want to. This weekend also marked the first time that Orange and I co-presented (“this is just this one time!”) for the rope presentations. It’s a good thing that she’s read a book about rope by some guy named Brad. Hot demos, bruises that needed to be explained to a different mother… I think it was a fabulous weekend all around.
October will be busy, but November and December will give all of us at Tranquility Keep some much-needed down-time, connection, and time to reflect on the events of the previous year and what our goals are for the future. Always remember, if you’re not having fun doing this, you’re doing something wrong. Stop. Figure it out, then find the joy that brought you here. I’m looking forward to what the future holds.
Yours in Leather,
Nefarious
Mr. SouthEast LeatherFest 2009
January 2010 Column
Dearest readers…
What we do is about having fun, isn’t it really? Over the last three months, I’ve had more fun than is legally allowed (except for certain areas) and it’s been great. There was only one presentation scheduled going into the last quarter of 2009, but we had so much fun doing it. DomCon invited me down to present Predicament Bondage (always fun), so Orange, Andy, and I went together and ended up doing so much more. If you look at my FetLife pictures, you can see some of the high points. Orange and Andy “warmed up” the class by explaining that I was going to be a few minutes late and why, then laid out the ground rules. Everything goes, it’s resistance play, and as long as the sign for “but more respectfully, Sir” is raised, it’s all good. “Heel training” takes on a whole, new meaning when it involves hobble ties, a plate full of bouncy-balls, and a dragon’s tail! Orange and I participated in a Dominant’s Roundtable discussion which went very well. It was also my first con to bootblack in chair, and I made connections that will always shine as high points in my journey. What I didn’t know was that it was my “final exam” in my apprenticeship as a bootblack. My bootblack Sensei, my slave Andy, wanted to observe me and we blacked together quite a lot. I had to chuckle at one point when one of my SELF judges loudly asked (with a smile) “Is that Nefarious on his knees serving?” My automatic response was, “I serve the community.” It’s what we do. We serve in whatever capacity is necessary for us to keep our community growing and strong. Saturday evening I had two powerful, consecutive blackings. First, I had a beautiful man whom I’ve swooned over (damn you, Andy!!!) let me do his boots and “make it pretty.” Afterward, I literally got to touch leather history; conditioned a pair of boots that once belonged to one of our spiritual elders. The energy that was shared, that experience, moved me to call the Head of our Family, share my awe, and then had to find a quiet place to shed some tears from such a powerful experience (thank you, Sirs, for that honor). The following Saturday my family presented me with my earned belt. They broadsided me with it and, for once, I literally was speechless.
Halloween weekend Andy and I were bound for San Francisco. It was my first major Leather event outside of the SouthEast region, but I was there in a service capacity. My boi Andy, SouthEast LeatherFest BootBlack 2008, competed for International Community BootBlack as part of International Leather Sir/boy. I am very proud to say that my boi competed well (a very, very close third place) and we’re all very, very proud of him. I’m somewhat appalled at myself, though. The night before the competition started we were walking through the Castro district. Gorgeous eye candy and architecture were all around us, but all I kept doing was nudging Andy with “hey, did you see those boots?” Oy! I didn’t get to black as the competitors worked the stands, so I was allowed to help take care of the den. One of the contestants needed occasional help with sign-language interpreting, so if I wasn’t with Andy I was with Evan. I learned sign-language as a JW interpreting our church services. The absurdity of the situation culminated with Evan and I literally rolling on the floor giggling as I tried to figure out how to interpret such phrases as “self-fisting” and things that I never heard of nor thought about when I was learning. When the prizes were being awarded, I was once again broadsided. The bootblacks created an award to thank me for what I’d done, so now I hold the first ever “Silver Brush” award for helping the blacks. I love you all! Y’all suck!
I started my title year focused on growth and learning. I’ve learned more from meeting new people in my travels than I think I’ve taught. I learned to believe in things that I’d sworn off. There are times when you have to believe and open your heart to things that you didn’t think possible. Orange and I started as friends. Our energies harmonized, and I’m very proud to say that she’s taken my collar and will soon take my name as well. Does that make her “Mrs. SELF?” I’ll have to check with Lady Catherine on that…WEG!!!
So, what does the first quarter of 2010 hold for our family? We’re performing in Charlotte, presenting in Virginia and Tennessee, and attending Kinky Prom. On top of that, we’re planning a wedding. Kids, in-laws, ‘nilla stuff… all of those things need attention. When you look at your life and your kink, remember that it is supposed to be a fun part of your life. Make sure that it stays that way. If it isn’t, stop to figure out why and change what you’re doing.
March 2010 Column
Reflections on a year.
These columns generally talk about what we have done over the last few months and what we will be doing in the coming quarter. This one will be no exception, but there will be more. This is my final column for my year as Mr. SouthEast LeatherFest. My year that officially began last June actually started in March when I competed at the North Carolina Leather Contest. Two weeks ago I attended this year's NCLC and had the opportunity to reflect on how much has happened over the past year. It has been an amazing experience and I'm honored that my judges decided that I could represent our region.
Because I front-loaded my title-year, I didn't travel as much as I had from July through December. The Mark in Tennessee invited us to present “Predicament Bondage,” and we had a wonderful time. We made no secret that Orange and I were “beta-testing” this version of the workshop and it went over very well. Instead of standing in front of the attendees for the entire time, we broke it into two sections. We had instruction and demonstration, but the we pushed the chairs back and had everyone interested join in the fun. Hands-on workshops generate a lot of energy, and it flowed that afternoon and well into the evening social. It was so much fun we are planning to make the eight-hour drive in July just because it was a great place to go, and we're really looking forward to our return.
Kinky Prom, a SELF fund-raiser, was an chance to throw-down and party, and that we did. Lots of dancing, hugs, smiles, pictures, and more dancing... the evening flowed as it should. It was great to see people that I hadn't seen since the previous June, and makes me look forward to returning to SELF. It's been a great year and strongly encourage any who wish to run for this title to do so. Win or lose, the process itself is life-changing. More than anything, I've learned a lot about myself over the past year, and with that knowledge has come growth. I didn't realize when I delivered my speech last year that the theme of “learning and growth” would be not just the platform that I would promote, but the year I would have.
So, where do we go from here? Honestly, more of the same. This year has been about reaching out, meeting people, and sharing our journeys. Each of us brings a piece of the truth to the table, and learning those things helps us find our own truth, grow as individuals, and grow as a community. Along with all of that work, finding the joy and fun in our chosen path needs to continue. There are things that we are serious and passionate about. Let's not forget what brings us together. The hot energy of leathersex, the shared enjoyment of each other's company, and the future that we shape with each step along our path.
Yours in Leather,
Nefarious
p.s. For those who read my last column, Orange (Jennifer from Charlotte, NC) and I did get married on March 27th. Not to take away from the amazing experience of carrying the title of Mr. SELF, I do have to say that it has been the highlight of my year. I never did hear back about whether that makes her Mrs. SELF though...LOL!
March 2010 Column
So ends my year as Mr. SouthEast LeatherFest. “Changes” would be a mild euphemism to describe what has happened during the past year. Do I have any regrets? Absolutely. Would I do some things differently? Yes. “Would-a, should-a, could-a” will drive a person insane if you let it. I started this year focusing on the platform of “education and growth.” I've learned much from my experience. I've grown from the experience as well. At the end of the day, I have enjoyed the journey. If my successor has half of the fun that I had this year, he'll be having a hell of a good time.
There are some things that I want to share and acknowledge. The work involved is not in any way, shape, or form just upon the one or two (for M/s) title-holders. I can't name all of the people who have helped in one way or another over the past year. So many have given or offered support: the producers, friends, family, loved ones, and new acquaintances. To each and every one, I say “thank you.” Thank you for making this year memorable, helping me learn and grown, and making this journey one that I will look back upon with a smile.
What's next? I'll continue on my journey of education and growth. Each of us knows that “giving back to the community” is a very high priority on any Leather journey. Keep that in focus. While you look to give to “the community,” remember those next to you. “Community” is not an abstract idea; it is individuals who come together. Remember that there is something bigger than ourselves, but don't forget the people who make up that community. They are the reason there is a community.
Margaret: SouthEast Bootblack 2009
2016 Update
Margaret Irene, former SELF Bootblack, will be competing for American Leatherwoman 2016 in Chicago during American Brotherhood weekend, October 7-9. Margaret held the title of SouthEast Bootblack for two years in a row, 2009 and 2010.
Margaret is a 36 year old native of Baton Rouge, Louisiana who now calls Baltimore her home. Her hobbies include gardening, baking, kayaking, playing dress up, and flirting with butches.
Margaret has held roles in several community organizations, including:
● Member and Communications Coordinator of FIST Baltimore/D.C.
● Founding member of the Mid-Atlantic Girls of Leather
● Past member of the Red Stick Volunteer Players (RSVP), Baton Rouge, Louisiana
Margaret’s community involvement includes:
● Member of FIST Baltimore; one of the longest running women’s backpatch clubs in the country
● Founding member of Mid-Atlantic Girls of Leather
● Production staff for Drummer North America
● Staff for 12 Days of Christmas, a Hooker and Boys Fundraising Production
● Staff for the 2017 inaugural Atlantic States Leather SIR/boy/Community Bootblack, a regional preliminary to ILSb/ICBB
● Past Board Member for SouthEast LeatherFest (SELF)
● Bootblack Contest Judge for SELF 2012 and 2013
● Tally master Great Lakes Leather Alliance (GLLA) 2011
● Volunteer at ABW, WILL, Beyond Vanilla, SouthPlains LeatherFest, Great Lakes Leather Alliance, Frolicon, and every event she attends that might need a helping hand.
Calendar of Events
July 10-1, 20091 American Brotherhood Weekend New Orleans, LA
September 26-27, 2009 Beyond Vanilla Dallas, TX
October 31, 2009 RSVP Halloween Party and Annual Auction Baton Rouge, LA
November 7, 2009 Philadelphia Leather Pride Night Philadelphia, PA
December 12, 2009 11th Annual 12 Days of Christmas Baltimore, MD
January 9, 2010 South Mississippi Association of Roses and Thorns (SMART) Demo Biloxi, MS
February 26-28, 2010 SouthPlains Leather Fest/ International Master/slave Weekend Dallas, TX
April 1-4, 2010 Frolicon Atlanta, GA
April 23-25, 2010 Beyond Leather Ft. Lauderdale, FL
May 14-16, 2010 Submissive Journey Weekend Pigeon Forge, TN
June 2009 Column
This was my second year at SELF. When I decided to attend SELF 2008, I never imagined I would be running for a title in 2009. WOW what a difference a year makes. I began this process almost a year ago as the contestant assistant to SouthEast Bootblack 2008, Andy. I was able to see firsthand what was involved and decided I would give it a go. Some obstacles presented themselves, but with the support of the Producers I was confident that a title run was possible.
My bootblacking skills developed over this year as I prepared for my title run. It was a slow process filled with many phone calls and emails back and forth to my mentors. I was also provided a place to hone my skills. I was provided support and I knew I always had a place to turn. Thank you to Elegant, Q and michael for your wisdom. To RSVP, thank you for providing a place for me to grow and learn to shine, not only as a bootblack but as a person.
Many in the community stepped up to support me through donations and contributions. This made my travel and auction baskets possible. Your generosity is greatly appreciated and will not be forgotten. I did not make this journey alone and each of you will be carried with me as I travel during my title year. Last year I felt lost in a sea of wonder and slight confusion. This year I felt like I was coming home. I look forward to representing that home during this year. To the Producers, SELF Board, staff and volunteers; thank you for making SELF what it is for so many.
Last but certainly not least, I could have not done this title run alone. Girl Kim and Amber, y’all were amazing. Your support during the weekend was invaluable. Dale, you were there when I needed you and a wonderful assistant. Best of luck on your journey. Ma’am and Erik, my sanity! There is nothing more to say than I owe you lots of silver polishing for everything that was done for me over the weekend. To my family, doing two title runs in one family is never easy but we did it and came closer in the process. My love to all of you. And to my wonderful Daddy, I hate that you were sick all weekend but receiving my title from you meant the world to me and left me speechless.
I am already busy scheduling events and I look forward to seeing many of you as I travel around the region. In July, American Brotherhood Weekend returns to New Orleans and promises to be a fun weekend. I will be coordinating the bootblack stands during the competition. All funds raised there will go toward charity. I will also be traveling to Beyond Vanilla to enjoy bootblacking with some great Texas bootblacks. Be looking for my future columns to keep up with my adventures in title holding.
Warmest regards,
Margaret
SELF Bootblack 2009
October 2009 Column
My title year got off to a wonderful start as I started walking! This was exciting as the last time many of you saw me I was still in a cast. I had my first adventure at American Brotherhood Weekend (ABW) in New Orleans. It was wonderful to assist the ABW family in welcoming many Leathermen and Leatherwomen into a city that I hold so near and dear to my heart. But I do have to say, leather… in July, are you SERIOUS! Congratulations to the new American Leather Family, American Leatherman Alex, Leatherwoman Dakota and Leatherboy johnny. All of the contestants were fantastic and the decision is one I am glad I did not have to make. The remainder of the summer was rather quiet as I spent time catching up on life, rehabilitating my foot and preparing for the fall.
In August and September, I was able to spend time with my home group, RSVP in Baton Rouge, and unwind from the craziness of running for my title. Life also gave me some twist and turns that have caused me to refocus my path. With amazing support from my producers and the SELF family, my title year promises to be amazing. Most of all, I have learned to take care of myself first and when to ask for help in doing that. In asking for this help, some incredible people have come into my life. I have also learned the true meaning of chosen family. Mine stretches from coast to coast and boarder to boarder and without them life might look a little different right now. Much gratitude for Princess Sisters, late night phone calls from the west coast and the Butchkateers.
During this time I developed some new class outlines for presentations. I am excited to have an opportunity to present to any group, big or small so please contact me. I was also asked to help restart MAsT – Baton Rouge. This has been a wonderful undertaking. I look forward to seeing this MAsT chapter grow and thrive in the Baton Rouge area. After this time of respite and reflection, it was time to get back on the road and meet people!
The end of September brought me to Dallas, TX to attend Beyond Vanilla XIX. This was an amazing weekend for me filled with chosen family, new friends and lots of boots. I participated in bootblacking for Bryan’s House. (www.bryanshouse.org) This is the chosen charity for Beyond Vanilla and over the years they have raised money to assist in the care of children with special health needs, in particular HIV/AIDS. For me Beyond Vanilla started with a Boots and Cigar party at the Dallas Eagle. That night, I was surprised/honored with being presented my first piece of earned leather, my vest. This vest will also carry my title patch. Upon writing this column, I am not sure the entire experience has sunk in yet but I am still in shock that my family and community has seen me grow and develop as a leathergirl to the point where I have earned my vest. I am truly humbled.
My travel kicks into high gear moving into the fall and winter with trips to Philadelphia, PA; Baltimore, MD… twice and Dallas, TX. I will also be traveling with in the region to New Orleans and South Mississippi.
Warmest Regards
~Margaret
January 2010 Column
Back on the path of the wandering title holder…
Being on the far western end of the region lends itself to interesting travels. The first of my travels brought me just down the road to RSVP’s Annual Halloween Auction and Fundraiser. This yearly event is the life blood of the group. The money raised at this event allows RSVP to maintain a premier educational and play facility for our region. The facility also functions as a hurricane shelter for “alternative” family units. This year we were fortunate as the facility was not needed. The auction this year set records even in spite of tough economic times. The weekend after the auction it was back on the road…
I had the opportunity to travel to Philadelphia for the first annual Philadelphia Leather Pride Night. It was wonderful to represent the Southeast during this inaugural event. Money was raised for the Leather Archives & Museum, the Leather Heart Foundation and the By the Grace of George fund. The spirit of community was alive and well during this event. I returned home to celebrate Thanksgiving with my family. It was a nice time to give thanks for the year I have had. My year has had many twists and blessings. The blessings continue to multiply. The end of the calendar year is always busy for me career wise so things slowed down a bit as far as title travels. I spent the time working on lining up a busy spring travel schedule. Look for the wandering bootblack around Baton Rouge, Atlanta (a few times), New Orleans, Dallas, Baltimore and a few other surprise places in the months to come.